To Listen be Silent

Did you ever notice the same letters make up the words silent and listen? Coincidence? Unlikely. On a conscious level. 

When looking at the words through your heat and conscious awareness I think the concepts of both merge into one dynamic truth.

Rev. Ali Bierman takes you on a tour of common conscious work choices make all the difference in your ability to communicate effectively allowing others to want to hear what you have to say because they know you matter to them, that you are being heard, that you matter. A quick summary leads you to incorporate these habits so they become natural no matter who are with, no matter the topic or intention of the communication and no matter wh or what outcome you intend for the listener to achieve.

She offers these practices - and really does mean to practice so the totality of these patterns become integrated into one’s normal being as opposed to a technique to realize ta definite outcome reflecting the agenda of the person posing as a friend who pretends to assist one  to improve their situation

1.Speak from the Heart: When communicating, prioritize authenticity. People feel your sincerity when your words resonate with your true feelings.

2.Active Listening is Key: Truly listen, without thinking of your response. Let the other person feel heard, understood, and valued.

3.Understand the Emotions Beneath Words: Pay attention to the emotions behind what is being said. Often, what’s left unspoken holds the most meaning.

4.Nonverbal Communication Speaks Volumes: Your body language, eye contact, and tone convey more than words. Be mindful of what you’re communicating nonverbally.

5.Practice Empathy, Not Sympathy: Empathy involves feeling with someone, not just for them. This connection fosters deeper, more meaningful conversations.

6.Ask Open-Ended Questions: Encourage dialogue by asking questions that require more than a yes or no. This invites deeper sharing and understanding.

7.Use “I” Statements to Express Feelings: Frame your feelings in a way that focuses on your experience without blaming the other person, e.g., “I feel…” instead of “You make me feel…”.

8.Pause Before Responding: Take a moment to process what’s been said before responding. This allows for more thoughtful, constructive communication.

9.

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Transcript

Have you ever noticed that the words listen and silent have the same letters in them?
That's the message I have for you today.
Why does listen and silent work together?

Hi, I'm Reverend Ali Bierman and I'm so glad that you joined us here today on the Let's Get Metaphysical Show where we show you how to discover the invisible forces running your life in every moment.
Not just now and then, but every single moment and it will make your life flow more easily.
And now let's continue.

When you're listening to somebody, in fact, when you're having a conversation with anybody, you want to do more listening.
And the best way to listen is to be silent, to not keep butting in,
to not be looking for your turn for the break in the other person's speaking so you could jump in with your ideas.

What we teach here every week is coming from your heart, living from your heart.
And so the kind of communication that really works is when you're coming from your heart.

People can tell when they're being listened to.

I remember a very well-known speaker sharing - 
sorry, I forgot the name. Maybe I'll find it one day.
Or if you know it, go ahead and share it with me.

It was on an airplane trip and he was carrying on a conversation with the passenger seated beside him.

Now, here's what's very fascinating.
When the two of them got off the plane, the one who was the person sitting beside the person I'm focusing on, heard the other man share,
That was the most interesting person I ever met." as he was talking to the companion who met him at the plane.

Why is that interesting?

Why is it interesting?

Because the person who is my subject who I follow, who I admire -  hadn't said very much at all.

All he did was ask a question and then follow up to whatever the response was with another question.

So communication is really about caring about what the other person says, coming from your heart so that when the person says something, respond to whatever remark or question that you asked,
then you encourage them, or, "wow, that's really something.
Tell me more?"
Or, "wow, that never happened to me.
Keep going."

Those kinds of words of encouragement keep the other person sharing about what's going on inside him, inside her.

Truly, the way to be a good conversationalist is ask a question,
listen for the response, encourage the person to go further with their response, ask another question that follows, obviously, from the remark, from the response the person had said a moment ago.

And you're really learning who the other person is, where they are in their life in that moment and how they're enjoying talking about themselves.

Because here's the key. Maybe you've noticed it.

People love to talk about themselves.

And the most beautiful word, at least in the English language, is a person's name. If you're using their name in the conversation in your reply, they're automatically feeling heard.

And you know the other side of that?

You're learning their name, because after you've spoken their name about three times, you're know their name. You're not going to forget it.

How many people do you know who say "oh, I can't remember names."
Well, that's what you're telling yourself and the other person -  nobody has an expectation of you to remember names.

When you're truly listening, the other person feels heard.
They know you're paying attention to them.
They feel understood.
And perhaps the most important thing is they feel valued.

Because in today's world, how often do we actually have an opportunity to be heard? To be valued?

It seems that most people are jumping in to get in the words they want to say. And actually, probably not even caring, not even paying attention to what you were saying because they couldn't jump in and start talking about their needs and their selves.

If they weren't listening, to truly listen, you want to be silent most of the time except for encouraging people to go on to help you more
.
Now, remember that people spend less time listening to the words.
We actually do our communications through our emotions.
Always be aware of the emotions that you're transferring energetically.

In other words, you are carrying on the conversation, you're valuing them, they're being heard because they feel the emotion that you're putting out there.

Stop and think about it for a moment right now.
Do you find yourself communicating verbally?
And that's what's going across to the other person?
Or is it the emotions with the words that are communicating or you're actually feeling?
How you're actually connecting?
How you're actually making a connection with the other person?

Remember that your body language is a really big important piece of your communication.

How are you listening with your body, with your eyes?
Eye contact in most cultures is very important.
And be aware of someone who's from a culture, which some indigenous cultures are like, eye contact is something to avoid.

Just by noticing when you're doing eye contact, at first, see if the other person's matching your eye contact, or maybe they're looking down or looking away.

Pay attention because you want to honor how the other person is communicating, feeling honored, and honoring you.

Remember that empathy is being with a person so they're feeling understood and valued, as opposed to sympathy, where you're jumping in with a solution, which may or may not be appropriate but people feel heard.

And when they feel heard, they're listening to themselves.
And they're coming up with their own solutions to anything they're wondering about for anything
that's bothering them.

Instead of asking, yes - no questions...
What happens when you ask a question and somebody can respond with yes or no?
It kind of kills the conversation, doesn't it?
There's no place else to go.
So ask questions that take them someplace else where they're going to elaborate on their words. And again, they're going to a deeper place because they feel understood.

When you're expressing your feelings, instead of telling the other people how to feel, this
is especially important when you're talking to children, use "I" messages so that people know, "I feel, la la la" or "I feel that I don't quite understand what you're saying. Can you tell me in different words in another way?"

Rather than attacking somebody with words like, "you make me feel" and they're angry and they're not connecting at all.

You can't make anybody feel a certain way.
They have to assign an interpretation to your words to make themselves feel that way. It's a choice they're making.
Is it accurate? No, it's just what's coming from their personal judgment of the words you're communicating.

Now, if somebody's asking you a question, just take a moment, pause, collect your thoughts instead of just jumping back in like an automaton, think about how you're interpreting what
their question might be, what your response might be.
And if it's unclear, then make yourself clear by asking, "I'm not sure what you mean by that. Can you say it a different way?"
So that will prevent miscommunications that can lead to arguments or hurt feelings.

Always remember, listen and silent use the same letters in the words.
So long as you're coming from your heart, so long as you're coming with words of emotions, feelings, you're going to be understood.
And equally important is the other person's going to feel like you're there with them really wanting, really caring about their need to be understood.

Now I want to share a couple things with you today.
You probably might be seeing this.(pointing to a patch above her eyebrow)
I had some really severe dizziness.
And by putting this patch on this particular acupuncture point, it decreases my dizziness.

Something else that has decreased my dizziness, you may or may not know that about 30% of people are very sensitive to energies.

I'm not talking about sensitive to feelings or words.
I'm talking about the energies present in the environment.

I'm one of those people and I realize, gee, I've been feeling cruddy lately and a little bit worse each day.
And then it dawned on me.
Oh, I live some place where there's 5G.
I've never lived any place with 5G before.
Really don't want your body in anything higher at the most, 3G.
And it was impacting me really badly.
In fact, when you look at pictures of live blood, you see the damage that 5G and the EMFs - and being on your cell phone can cause in just two minutes, the number of blood cells being damaged.
And when I remembered that I'm sensitive and I remembered that there's
not just 5G in the house all the time, but the modem never goes off because I'm not in control of it.

Our neighbors are probably at most, let's see, looking out the window.
I would say they're probably not more than 20 tops 30 feet away in each direction.

So being barded by things that I'm not used to being barded by, because I'm used to being out in the country with a whole lot less EMFs and with a whole lot lower, as I said, it was 2G before.
So realizing that I remembered that for many, many years, I was using a product by Aultera and as soon as I remembered that, I went and ordered a replacement because somebody, I
don't know if it's accidentally, they threw my Aulterra house protection device away.

This is fantastic because now they have whole family plans.
So now I have it on all my devices and I have one that takes care of the whole house and another one that takes care of the car.
So as soon as I connected all of those devices, no exaggeration,
in less than 2 hours, my energy level came way up.

So especially if you're sensitive to energy, whether or not you know it, you're being impacted by it. You're going to feel even better when you learn about the devices, you will see the link in
the show notes and when I got it, I got just a super sale and I think it was a back to school sale so you can get your devices using that back to school sale. 

What else is important for you to know? Audible has a very special
free 30 day trial for you. You can choose a book of your choice and explore the whole site. They have some amazing podcasts you can't get any place else like ours. And when you take advantage, I highly recommend, you know that I'm very into science and philosophy
and art and I decided, you know what, nobody ever reads to me.

So I went in looking for fiction stories.
So I've been listening to a number of stories for children and also to books like The Lord
of the Rings, some other fiction books. I can just lie there, close my eyes and be read to.
I love Audible and I encourage you to go in and look for what feels good to you. Stories, adult stories, fiction, pretty much any topic you're interested in. And that link is also in the show notes.

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Again, this is Reverend Ali Bierman thanking you for joining us here today for Let's Get Metaphysical show.

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InJoy! every moment that's Capitol-I-N, Capitol-J-O-Y, because nothing in your life happens outside of you.

You're interpreting whatever's coming in the environment once it gets into your body, into your mind.
Otherwise, it just goes by.

When a tree falls in the forest and there's nobody there to hear it,
is there a sound?

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